- break the silence!
- Does someone beat you?
- Have you been hit or beaten before?
- Does someone threaten you with violence, subject you to mental terror, or force you to have sex?
- Is this person your husband, boyfriend, ex-husband or another family member?
- Does this affect your children?
Here is some advice
You can phone anonymously on 70 20 30 82
This is a service giving advice on violence against women.
It is open 24 hours a day.
Do you live in a violent relationship?
Approximately one woman in ten over 15 years of age suffers violence from her husband or ex-husband. This can be:
- physical violence – he slaps, hits or beats you; shoves you or throws you around; uses weapons or other objects.
- mental terror – he threatens you or your children with violence. He shouts at you, criticizes you constantly, monitors or isolates you, or humiliates you in the presence of others.
- sexual abuse – he forces you to have sex against your wishes.
- financial terror – he destroys your possessions, or ensures that you do not have enough money for food and other necessities.
You don’t have to live with violence!
Maybe you think you shouldn’t worry so much about your husband’s violence.
Maybe you tell yourself it isn’t happening, because it is so bad, or you feel ashamed.
Maybe you think it’s your fault, or that you have provoked him? No matter what, he must NOT slap, hit or beat you!
In Denmark, hitting or injuring another person is a criminal offence – at home or anywhere else.You don’t have to live with violence! Not at all!
The sooner you do something to stop it, the better – for you and for your children.
Do the children know?
In most cases, the children know about violence in the family. Many surveys confirm this. Children worry about violence.
It makes them unhappy. In the short term, their worries can make them restless or unable to concentrate in school. In the long term, violence in the family can mean they will have more problems than others as adults – that they will have less quality of life.
The adults must therefore do something to stop the violence. Children need to see someone act when something unreasonable happens.
What can you do?
You may not have to leave your husband to stop the violence.You can get help in any case. Because violence must stop. Now.
There are several ways to get help and advice.You can also move to safety with your children temporarily, where there are other women with the same problems.You can ALWAYS be anonymous.
What can you do?
- You can:
arrange for you and your children to stay with family or friends when necessary. - phone 70 20 30 82 anonymously. Here, women with violent partners can get advice 24 hours a day.
- tell your doctor about the violence. He or she can help you decide what your best options are.
- go to the casualty department. Tell them what happened. Make sure you are alone when you are examined. (The doctor can ask your husband or partner to wait outside.)
- phone the police and ask them to come if you have been beaten or sexually abused.
- contact your municipality (kommune) anonymously and ask for help. You can either phone or visit the welfare service (Socialforvaltningen) personally.
- ask a teacher at the school or daycare centre to help you contact the municipality if you cannot do it yourself.
- go directly to a women’s safe house. You can also contact a safe house through your municipality, doctor, friends or family. There are about 40 safe houses in Denmark.
- Phone 70 20 30 82 for the addresses.You can also phone the safe house information office at: 32 95 90 19, or visit their home page at: www.lokk.dk.
Your rights
It is your right to report any violence or terror you have experienced to the police. You can do it yourself, or a relative, friend or neighbour can do it for you. If the police have come to your house during the violence, a policeman
or policewoman can also report it.
When you report violence, you must describe what happened. It is best to go to a police station, but you can also report it by telephone.
You have the right to take along someone you feel safe with when you go to the police station. This can help you feel stronger in what you do. It is often an unpleasant situation, but it can be necessary to do it before you can live your life without violence.
You have the right to an interpreter if you do not speak Danish. For example, an interpreter who is not a relative.
You have the right to anonymous and free advice from your municipality (kommune). Everyone does. The municipality can tell you what rights you have if you stay with your husband, or if you leave him.
Good advice
If you have decided to leave your husband next time he is violent, it would be a good idea to have an “emergency bag” ready. For example, you can pack:
- some clothes for you and the children
- some money (maybe a bank card)
- an extra key to your home
- some toys for the children
- any medicine and prescriptions
- telephone numbers and addresses
- official papers for you and the children (for example: passports, marriage licence, birth certificates, health insurance cards, and immigration papers).
Remember that you can apply to keep your Danish residence permit if you leave your husband because of violence. This is also true if you got your residence permit because your husband lives in Denmark.
In other languages
This brochure is available in nine languages:
Danish, English, Bosnian, Turkish, Arabic, Somali, Thai, Russian and Farsi.
You can see the text in other languages by changing language in the menu above, you can ask for the printed folder it on phone no. 33 17 09 00. Or simply download it from here
These leaflets have been produced as part of the campaign to combat men’s violence
against women and children in their families 2005-2008.
Minister of Social Affairs and Gender Equality
Organisation of Crisis Centres for Women
